Edgar of all trades

The latest sensation, in my mind, is this mashup on youtubedoubler of an Usher song and a goat.

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Billy the goat worked as a fry cook at Aunt B’s Restaurant on Canton Highway in Marietta, Georgia. Late summer last year, Usher stopped in for lunch one Monday. It wasn’t busy and as he sat on one of the stools instead of taking a table, he got to talking with his server. Billy was in the kitchen doing his thing and listening to the radio.

Opting for some breakfast for lunch, the server took her ticket and hung it in the ticket wheel by the window to the kitchen. Billy the goat took the order and noticed Usher, recognizing him right away. Deciding right then and there, he would bring out the food and try to audition for him.

See, ever since Billy was a kid, he knew he wanted to be a star. He even won several awards in school talent shows. Billy ultimately was forced to take a job to support his ailing parents. They were involved in a freak metal can-eating accident.

As the pancakes were finished, along with a side of sausage and grits, Billy prepared himself, ensured his beard was straight and took the food out to the counter.

“Maaah” said Billy trying not to sound too eager. “Maaah.”

Usher looked at him. Stared. Then, he said “What the hell?”

“Maaah.” Billy could not believe what he was saying, “Maaah, maaah!” He was going for it, this was the point of no return. Might as well do it. Might as well ask. “Maaah?”

Usher’s mouth was open, he looked stunned. He sat there on the stool next to the counter, right by the blueberry pie in glass. He blinked. Took a breath and let it out. “Very well, show me what you got, goat.”

“Maaah!” Billy for the second time in five minutes could not believe. He was auditioning for THE Usher! “Maaah, maaah, maaah. Maaah.” He hoped he was in tune.

“Stop, goat. I’ve heard enough.” said Usher, bobbing his head slightly. “Lemme eat my food, I have a song I’d like you to collaborate on with me.” He shoved a spoonful of grits in his mouth. “What did you say your name was?”

“Maaah.”

To be continued…

I love reading and especially writing. Its one of the reasons I maintain two blogs. its also the reason I follow @ChiTribBooks and as many authors and literary people, like @amyguth, @ann_aguirre, @Jamie1km, etc. and aspiring (or accomplished) writers/bloggers like @zombie_joe and @worldofhiglet and @kiala. I can go on and on.

Amy Guth, while writing for ChicagoNow’s Chicago Subtext, had some badass mini flash fiction contests. She would provide an image of some random thing and have us write a ‘complete story” in 100 words or less. I wrote about it on this blog in September.

As I said, I love writing, and as part of the Year of the Edgar movement, I need to push myself to write more. I could just sit down and do it, but I want to try something similar to the flash fiction.

I want you to help me write some short stories. Either email the requests to edgar at edgargarcia dot com or post them as a comment below. I will not be limiting myself to 100 words or less, although I will make them as brief as possible. Your rules. i only ask that you not give me inappropriate guidelines. I reserve the right to reject a request, also, whatever is given to me is assumed to be given to me as being my property for legal purposes, although just contact me if you wish to discuss legalities and such, I’m just a tiny blog anyway.

The point is, give me as much information about what you want me to write about as you want. A character, a word, an item, a genre, use certain word or words or items in a story… its endless. Again, don’t limit me to a certain number of words (like “it has to be under 100 words”). I will try to write the stories as small as I can. I may even get creative and mix multiple ideas into one story. I’d like to get at least five different sources more is better (sources means people, you can send me as many separate ideas as you like but I want a bunch of people to participate so help spread the word.) My plan is to see if I have enough story ideas that I can then post some sort of vote and see which one people want me to elaborate more on. This way you guys get more story/content for free. I may even incorporate more “throw ideas at me” to further the story.

Help me out. I want to write for you guys. What will I write? Its up to you!

Edgar