Edgar of all trades

Master of all

The latest sensation, in my mind, is this mashup on youtubedoubler of an Usher song and a goat.

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Billy the goat worked as a fry cook at Aunt B’s Restaurant on Canton Highway in Marietta, Georgia. Late summer last year, Usher stopped in for lunch one Monday. It wasn’t busy and as he sat on one of the stools instead of taking a table, he got to talking with his server. Billy was in the kitchen doing his thing and listening to the radio.

Opting for some breakfast for lunch, the server took her ticket and hung it in the ticket wheel by the window to the kitchen. Billy the goat took the order and noticed Usher, recognizing him right away. Deciding right then and there, he would bring out the food and try to audition for him.

See, ever since Billy was a kid, he knew he wanted to be a star. He even won several awards in school talent shows. Billy ultimately was forced to take a job to support his ailing parents. They were involved in a freak metal can-eating accident.

As the pancakes were finished, along with a side of sausage and grits, Billy prepared himself, ensured his beard was straight and took the food out to the counter.

“Maaah” said Billy trying not to sound too eager. “Maaah.”

Usher looked at him. Stared. Then, he said “What the hell?”

“Maaah.” Billy could not believe what he was saying, “Maaah, maaah!” He was going for it, this was the point of no return. Might as well do it. Might as well ask. “Maaah?”

Usher’s mouth was open, he looked stunned. He sat there on the stool next to the counter, right by the blueberry pie in glass. He blinked. Took a breath and let it out. “Very well, show me what you got, goat.”

“Maaah!” Billy for the second time in five minutes could not believe. He was auditioning for THE Usher! “Maaah, maaah, maaah. Maaah.” He hoped he was in tune.

“Stop, goat. I’ve heard enough.” said Usher, bobbing his head slightly. “Lemme eat my food, I have a song I’d like you to collaborate on with me.” He shoved a spoonful of grits in his mouth. “What did you say your name was?”

“Maaah.”

To be continued…

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